It has been too long

It's been almost two months since I posted last. Don't misinterpret this - my life is as entertaining as ever, and I will continue to fail to suitably describe this fact - I haven't posted in a while because it's been too entertaining. Here's a quick bullet list to catch you up:

• Oatmeal, who you may remember from when I had my second most awkward pseudo-kiss ever, and I are now an item (we are dating, I am awkward).
• I moved from one side of the bay bridge to the other. I now live with my old friend Stephen (formerly known as Tiny Dancer) and the Brothers (Thing 1 and Thing A).
• Stephen and my mutual friend Patrick nearly died from firewater and as a result does not enjoy fine booze any longer. As a supportive measure, Stephen and I have both given up drinking as well.
• I was laid off from my excellent job at Movie Rental Location. I will soon be working at Themed Pizza Location. This is a step sideways for me, and acts as a motivator to find another way to earn money. I have seriously considered writing a jingle and living on the royalties for the rest of my life.

I have started changing the fake names I use to more accurately reflect personalities, while at the same time being less ridiculous. I will re-introduce people with their new names as they appear.